dreams?

lately, i've been having these strange dreams. dreams that seems to be telling me something, yet, i can't figure out what they mean. its like i always wake up before the "ending" starts.

first, i dreamt about being someone else who can transform into something it touches, the other night, i dreamt that i was some monster that seems to be frightened by hurting people, and last night, i dreamt that i was a leader of some weird cult that has some pagan practices. and the only thing common in these dreams is that he was always there, and i could hug him tight, but then i'm supposed to hurt him for my survival, but when im about to do such thing, i can't.. and so then he leaves me... geez, i dont know what it's trying to tell. and im scared to know what it means..

this month, i've been feeling down. it seems that i am lost, that i want to reach out for someone.. i've been so insecure lately, scared to loose him, scared to be away by his side. damn. i wish i just could be strong enough to face what i'm feeling right now. strong enough to tell him what i want. i need him.. i dont know if he needs me, but i do need him. and i love him.. i don't care about what's going to happen to me in the future, but i loose him, maybe... maybe then, i could find myself in the deepest ocean, wanting for serenity..

my dreams, what are they trying to me.. what am i supposed to do? how can i face these fers that i have?


damn.





tovma! hehehehehe