almost valentines day

love season....

it sucks.. i dont have someone to hold my hand to. all i hear are i love you's from people that i really dont know and people tellin me that they missed me even if they dont. i wish things go back to the dreams that i was having long before.. i miss that old feelin.. but wasnt i stupid? while i tried to break the trance that i was into because missed loneliness, but now that its here, it really sucks!!

i wonder what it would feel like..


*sniffs*


i just cant go into a relationship without finding out what i really want.. so stupid.

sh*t

i am so sorry..

sorry....

really.. i mean this.......

i feel so bad..

sh*t

i am so sorry..

sorry....

really.. i mean this.......

i feel so bad..

sh*t

i am so sorry..

sorry....

really.. i mean this.......

i feel so bad..

and its like this

i made my mistake..
its been a while..

here's an update...

christmas was sad,

new year ws boring.. and had my first bottle of red wine.,

classes started at jan2.

had to do lots of write-up,

had my first 2 sticks of cigarettes and my first super long night out on sinulog..

now i feel sick.. i miss touching my nose with somebody else's nose.. i miss bgein hugged..
i miss huggin.. i miss saying i love you and hearing that phrase from someone who really does love me..

it sucks..

and this is gonna be for real...

never been worse.

im so scared.......